I will never understand

August 4th at 11:01 pm the Lord took my precious nephew and gave him his angel wings, Noah Christian Bagley. And I am sure it will take the rest of life and I still would not understand why the Lord takes the ones who we need the most. Everyone keeps telling us that it was all apart of His plan but it does not keep me from wondering. I am going to wonder for the rest of my life what his laugh would of been like, what he would wear the first day of school, if he would get along with his older brother, and if he would be just as much of a little turd to me as his brother is. I know people may not get. I don't even understand it myself, it all still seems so surreal to me. I cannot grasp it. When I was holding him I was expecting him to move, breath, blink, anything. I held him and questioned God for everything. I yelled and screamed and cursed him out for taking this life of this precious, perfect little human. And I still have not found peace. I'm not sure I ever will. All I can do is know that Noah is is a better place. He has his wings and is welcomed with open arms up there. Look over us little man. My guardian angel. 143 NCB <3

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