2 years later

so i was reading some of my old blogs and I read my first one that I ever posted on here and it got to me. I was in such a dark place my senior year and half of last year and it is crazy to look back and see not only how much has changed but then...

fighting myself

So I haven't written in a while. Everything has been good up until this point. School and cross were great. My nephew was born on sunday. I am one proud auntie. He is so dang precious. I jus wish I was there to hold him and love on him and show him...

is this real?

everything feels too good to be true right now, well it has for a while now. for a few months now. I guess after so long of being treated like shit in past relationships will do that to you tho. I am still in shock that this amazing, perfect girl took...

the definition of perfect

wow,,,where to start? I got to see my girl. finally. it had been almost three months since I saw her. we drove to meet her cause she was with her friends. it was amazing, I saw her the 4th and that night we stayed in a hotel and then the 5th we did...

20 days!

okay so 20 days until I get to see my girl. last time I saw her? April 27th. HOLYYYY SHIIIEEETTT! It has been way too long. almost two months, but we are still going strong. ahh. it is actually starting to hit me that I will finally have her in my...

this night changed my life

have you ever been with someone and known that something was just....different with them? that's how I feel with my girl. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her. I knew something with her was different from the first time we ever talked.. ...

isn't it strange how things can change?

today was a rough day, I have no idea why but I woke up feeling terrible. I felt lost an not in control of my life. it is a scary feeling and I didn't know how to deal with it.. my girl was there for me even tho I didn't even have to tell her anything...

jus one of those days

i'm jus in one of those moods today, where I can't explain how or why I feel this way.  I miss her so damn much today  all I want to do is lay in bed an listen to music but I know I have to get going with my day  I have to try an forget the...

I have got to be thee luckiest girl alive

I jus got off FaceTime with my girl and time flew by so damn fast. I am about to go up camping for the weekend with my family and she is heading to work so I had to see her before I went up. ima miss her like crazy that's for sure. she kept giving me...

no matter what happens

so my parents have never been accepting of me being gay, and I am not going to lie it hurts when your own parents would rather see you upset an unhappy being with someone you don't want to be with or forcing you to be "normal". they are constantly...

my rock

wow I haven't wrote in a long time and so much has happened. for the better of course though. I am home for the summer. I got done with school about 4 weeks ago and got home 3 weeks ago. track was the best. I don't think it could have gotten any...

looking ahead, never going back

two days and ima be back in CO (: I couldn't be more excited to see all my family and Jazz.(: things have been looking up and I have felt on top of the world the past two weeks. I have fully let go of my past and all the people who do not matter...

two weeks

two weeks and I will be home, to see my family and my best friend is going to be a huge relief. the past month has been a constant struggle and I feel like I am barley above water. they are what is keeping me sane and I thank God for that. although I...

so long..

so this is going to be my last blog on here, it's too much for me right now. seeing that we used to be so happy, used to be so carefree, it hurts. I have no idea where her and I stand right now, but I am numb. I don't feel anything anymore, but its...